Have you ever wondered how another person could say or do something so out of the realm of what you would ever say or do?
The Enneagram of personality types answers this question in great and elegant depth and in my work with individuals, I treasure the profound wisdom this system offers.
The Enneagram describes 9 types of personality and the world looks very different to each of the nine types. These types develop in response to self protection and injury, creating a protective false self that hides the true self that you really are.
Each type has a unique way of thinking, feeling and acting. Each type also possesses a great gift in terms of special talents and ways of being in the world that contribute to life. However, as luck would have it, each type has an aspect, if not brought to consciousness that can create difficulties for you and others in your life.
Knowing your type will give you incredible self-compassion. As you free yourself from those aspects that create pain for yourself and others, you will be graced with the freedom of choice. You do not have to continue to react from the restriction of your type.
Understanding how the significant others in your life experience the world will give you a depth of compassion. Behavior which caused great confusion will make sense to you and you will develop the gift of tolerance.
In my work with couples, the Enneagram has been incredibly important. When you and your partner understand your Enneagram personality types, you will recognize that what is creating pain is not a deliberate attempt by your partner to be hurtful but rather a coping skill and a sensitivity that is different from yours. With this deepened awareness profound understanding and relief happen.
Where attention goes for each point on the Enneagram (this list is a vast oversimplification of each type).
- Point One- evaluating what is correct or incorrect in a situation
- Point Two-gaining approval from others by fulfilling perceived needs
- Point Three-obtaining positive attention based on performance
- Point Four-noticing what is missing in life, self and others
- Point Five-maintaining privacy and warding off intrusion
- Point Six-scanning environment for clues to hidden intention of others
- Point Seven-noticing what is pleasant and creating optimistic plans for the future
- Point Eight-avoiding loss of control
- Point Nine-Attempts to determine other people's agendas and points of view
This system is designed to point out defenses not needed any longer. In learning this system you will have a chance to see reality as it is and not through the filter of your type's illusory ideas and feelings. The Enneagram is a way to return home to the essential person you are.